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What am I missing?

Today I was reminded of a concept that I just couldn’t leave alone-

Let’s say you have put in a ton of research to find a plan or a formula to help you reach a goal, your state of being, or something that you are passionate about- but you aren’t getting the results you expected. Should you quit? Is your plan wrong? Do you need to just push a little harder?


If you are missing this one crucial element, you will frustrate your own plan. You will get in your own way.

Let me illustrate this with a few different examples:

Fast Marathon Runner-


1 speed drill

1 Threshold run

2 easy runs

1 cross train

1 rest day

1 long run = Success?

Raising a “good kid”-

Excellent school

Proper nutrition

Chores and accountability


Service opportunities =Success?

In theory, YES these factors should help you with your goals, but the one crucial element that seems to never quite get the attention it deserves is TIME.

Time might look different in each scenario too. With the runners goals, there needs to be a reasonable amount of time to train to allow your mind and body to get to where you want it to be. It absolutely takes patience.

With raising a “good kid” the same applies, but also YOUR TIME needs to be factored in. Where are YOU in this equation? If your child feels disconnected from you it will disrupt the school performance, how they show up and are accountable, and sometimes even in sports- trying to prove they are worth your time.

We are so impatient here in America. Way back in the 1960’s Swiss Psychologist Jean Piaget brought his teachings to America to educate us on the way a child's brain develops through a series of intelligence tests. His findings were to educate us on how a child sees and processes the world, and what limitations in perspective they might have at each phase of development. Afterwards the question we wanted answered was not how can we meet these children where they are, but how can we speed up their cognitive process!!


Because we are so impatient.

“Let patience have her perfect work” it states in the Bible. By now you all probably know that the Hebrew word for perfect is complete. The work cannot be complete without patience. If you read the rest of that verse in James 1:4, it says “that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing” how profound is that?

So if you feel like you are doing all the right things, but you aren’t getting the answers…

Or if you are trying your best, but you are questioning your efforts…

Or if you can see the goal, but you just aren't quite there yet…

Patience my friend.

Allow it to be.

Let patience have her perfect work. Don’t force it, trust it.

You will see in time why you needed to develop here a little, and there a little.

Also, be patient with those around you too. With your kids, your partner, your family and friends- they all need your patience and quality time too. When you are feeling emotionally stretched, take a deep breath and realize patience may need to be factored into your plan. Also, maybe consider taking time out for JOY. Make a way in your “plan” for the things that add color to your world.

What do you like to do that brings you joy?

When you are with your partner, what brings you joy?

What do you like to do with your kids that brings you joy?


Where in your life can you see the need to let go and let patience have her perfect work?

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